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The man’s lived nearly half his life he looks around at kids and wife he’s her man and he’s their dad but even so he still feels sad sad about what he doesn’t know save for the fact it seems to grow on autumn’s often chilly nights after wife and kids are set to rights he stands outside to close his eyes and lifts his hands to evening skies and prays to feel the way he did when he was just a little kid back then he never thought it odd to talk and laugh and sing with God but now his childhood friend feels far as brother moon and northern star. After a spell the sound of the train stirs up that verse about ‘not in vain’ so he lowers his hands and opens his eyes and steadies himself to step back inside guessing with age its not all that bad to be thoroughly happy, occasionally sad.